Pain as Part of Our Shared Universal Story
"In the anguished moments of loneliness, grief, and fear that can touch our lives, we are convinced that no one else has ever felt this way before. Yet there may be a moment when we find the courage to open our eyes and hearts and see that same pain mirrored in the eyes and lives of everyone around us."
- Christina Feldman
Boundless Heart
An inquiry for tough times:
Which map am I more likely to orient from in moments of guilt, shame, fear, anxiety, sadness, or any of the myriad painful experiences that show up in life?
Is it a map showing that I am the only one having this experience, alone and separate, leading me to believe that something is uniquely "wrong" with me while most "normal" people are doing just fine?
Or is it one showing the surprising number of people worldwide experiencing something strikingly similar at this very moment, making it plain to see that I am not even close to alone in this pain?
Orienting from this broader, more realistic context can help us integrate the wisdom that pain features in every life. Touching into the shared story of suffering that Christina illuminates is not intended to overwhelm us with the amount of pain in the world. Instead, it helps us know the subtle warmth of belonging to each other even in the midst of the painful experiences that show up. This shift can turn a moment of anguish that makes us feel separate from the rest of the world that's "doing just fine" into a moment of deep connection, compassion, and understanding of our common humanity.
More From Christina Feldman
The quote from this post is from Christina's Book, Boundless Heart: The Buddha's Path of Kindness, Compassion, Joy, and Equanimity. You might be particularly interested in this book if you've enjoyed practicing lovingkindness meditation but haven't studied or practiced with the other brahma viharas. Christina offers a rich overview of the teachings and an array of accessible practices to try.
I'm also excited to see that she has put together an online course covering the seven factors of awakening, available on September 13th, 2021. Having taken her previous course, Universal Empathy, I expect it will be a wonderful collection of teachings.
See another insight I illustrated from Christina here.
Illustrations and notes by Devin O’Guin
